ToiTime

Mental Wellness and Self Care Queen

Guess who got some sleep?  Nothing like a refreshing night sleep to get you going.  So now that I am refreshed to live another day, there has been something on my mind lately.  In the Fall many of us are renewed to complete our goals.  We have enjoyed some vacation time and are ready to conquer the to do list.  However, if you aren’t careful while you are on the road to success there will be many detours along the way.  Often times it comes in the form of head games.  Things that come to distract you from your purpose.

I was reading through a magazine and all of the magazines always have 10 ways to do this and that.  No one talks about how to keep your sanity while pushing through this thing we call life.  So I would admonish you to find out a few things about yourself that you can tap into when you need them.  It can be a happiness bucket which is just a place you can go to get the things YOU need to make it.  This isn’t something that is mirrored by what a significant other can do for you but little things that you alone can control and enjoy.  For instance I hear ladies say they love flowers but their boo thang won’t buy them. Treat yourself to a nice bouquet or go to a flower shop and make one of your own.  Why go through the drama of saying what you wished you had and you can do it on your own. Is it much nicer to get them from a lover? Absolutely.  However if flowers is something that makes you feel special you better tap into knowing that and making it happen with or without a boo.  If you are the type that likes a favorite drink every now and again, get it. That drink on a bad day can be the difference between a blow out or a cuss out any day.

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How will you know about what makes you happy?  By spending time with yourself.  Often times we expect others to fill our jars with so much and often times we aren’t even willing to do the same.  Why should someone do for you what you won’t do.  If you know you need a little me time than take it.  Don’t get mad at the  one who can get it when you haven’t moved one mountain to ensure your mental space is clear and light.  Life is hard.  There are so many challenges along the way.  It always seems as if once you are over one hurdle there is another one waiting to replace it.  Why not smile a little and have some peace.  It doesn’t mean that your situations will be super great.  They may never change.  They may get worst but there is something about peace that is priceless.  It allows you to go through the fire and not be burned.  Its indescribable.  You owe it to yourself to be at your best at all times.  If you need to fill your bucket than fill it up.

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Here are a few things I do for myself:

  1. Read a magazine while sipping on tea or my favorite coffee or hot chocolate (usually when the kids go down so I don’t even have to tell them no they can’t have)
  2. Go to Barnes and Nobles.  I really should have stock
  3. Call a friend and chit chat-conversations will remind you how blessed you are
  4. Go get a pedicure or a manicure-nothing like a little self pampering
  5. Turn my bathroom into my personal spa day-yes you don’t have to have a lot of coin to be relaxed
  6. Go for a drive. Nothing too far but music up and blaring helps
  7. Journal-I do this often and even carry one in my purse that way if something comes up I don’t have to wait until later and risk forgetting
  8. Indulge in my favorite snack-I can’t do this all the times since I’m on team healthy but every now and again is definitely necessary
  9. Glass of wine-if you don’t drink that’s fine this is my list and I love a good Moscato
  10. Dance off with my kids. This is something that helps shake whatever issues have come about with the little ones.  They forget about bad behavior and I can get their focus
  11. Music-I have about 5 go to songs depending on the mood.  I always start off with a little southern rap and then mellow out to a little Fred Hammond.  Judge your mother, it helps trust me!
  12. Sex-yep it’s not a typo I’s married.  Sex can lighten the mood and is a great work out!
  13. I find a little coffee shop I’ve never been and sit outside when I can. Outside clears my head
  14. A good book duh you can’t tell I am avid reader by now?
  15. A trip home.  Nothing says relaxed than being in my own element like a trip to see my family and be AT (aunt Toi) for the day.

Whatever your list looks like, learn to tap into it when times get hard.  Everyone needs to know what makes them happy.  Tap into your own happiness and don’t wait for others to do for you what you can do for yourself.

 

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