Ask Toi: Valentine’s Day Edition: My wife states she doesn’t want a Valentine’s Day gift should I not get one?
Getting a gift for Valentine’s Day just because you are married is not mundane. I dislike people making the excuse that if your husband loves you he doesn’t have to show you love on Valentine’s Day. If your spouse loves you and wants to shower you with a gift on that day he can. If you as a couple have come to the conclusion that you don’t exchange gifts that is fine too. Just be sure that when you state you don’t want a gift you are mature to make that decision and not give your spouse Hell come that day because you made a decision to be something you aren’t.
Gift Exchange
It’s okay to be married and exchange or not to. I encouraged that man to honor his wife’s words, by getting something and not giving to her that day but finding another day to give her a gift. This way if she by chance is one of these women who say things but don’t mean it he will still be covered and if she is standing by not wanting to exchange, he has a gift to give her as a thinking of you gift.
Say What you Want for Valentine’s Day
Ladies, I want to encourage you if you can’t stand by your decision to not give gifts, do NOT ever tell a man something you can’t stand by 100%. This is the same thing when you get into an argument. Don’t tell a man to leave the house and you don’t want him to leave. Or you get mad and use the big “D” word out of anger. This is a larger principle of not saying things to either look like the “cool” wife. Do not say things out of anger that you can’t back up. Out of all of the times that I have argued with my husband I have learned not to say what I don’t mean. If you want a gift, it’s perfectly ok to say you want to exchange on Valentine’s Day.
Don’t Play Valentine’s Day Games
What’s not okay to do is to play games or say things you think they want to hear. This will disappoint you in the long run. This you should have known mess that people pull in relationships shows lack of maturity. Relationships are about communication. Saying or acting in one manner that isn’t who you are makes it hard for either one of you to walk in love because you spend more time recovering from idle messages!
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Right on time! Life is short. Enjoy all of the holidays that we are blessed to have the opportunity to experience. Happy Valentines Day to you and your family!
Thank you and same to you and yours
I’m that type of wife. But overall we are that type of couple who don’t give gifts but we prefer travel and experiences. If you want to get her something, get her maybe something small, something she has mentioned or had her “eye” on or take her somewhere she may have been wanting to go. Flowers are still in style. The gift doesn’t have to be expensive or over the top, just something to say you care & she is still the one. She will appreciate the gesture.