ToiTime

Mental Wellness and Self Care Queen

It’s hard to see how life could be preparing for you better when the worse is happening. When life is kicking your behind with no breaks it’s hard to remain positive. However the truth is even in the worse or the thick of things, life really is preparing you for better. 

It doesn’t mean that life is going to continue to serve bad times. Even in times of greatness life can literally take a turn. However one of the things to keep in mind is that it always turns. Your response to the turn is what matters the most. If you plan on making the best of it you will have to take its lessons and turn them into triumphs. I know the strongest of women who didn’t have a plan in place but continued to move towards the betterment and it worked not because themselves were magical but they wouldn’t take no for a final answer. 

Let me share one story of my own life with you. When I first had my daughter I worked hard at work. I lost my job due to downsizing. I would spend all night in the hospital and wait for my cousin or friends to come after working their 3rd shift jobs to sit with her so I could go to work and come back. I cried all the way to the hospital. I didn’t have an iPhone to see her. I had to trust that my family and friends would do what I would so I could work and make money to take care of her. IT was hard. 

I moved to Philadelphia and found out surprise I was pregnant again. I knew it didn’t make sense to pay full price for a toddler and a newborn so I became the best stay at home mom I could. I was miserable dealing with postpartum in a new city with limited friends. When I tried to go back to work it wasn’t easy. I had a college degree and strong work references but getting a job was hard. I had to take temporary assignments rushing to get them to avoid paying a late fee because it made sense to let my husband work since his work was bringing in more money and had more stability. It was hard watching him flourish while I felt like I was drowning. I cried a LOT. I was miserable only telling others of my stress. However fast forward now those lessons prepared me for my busy life now:

I won’t work anywhere I can’t control my schedule. I found that instead of fighting working full time if I had to work taking a part time or temporary positions if I had to wasn’t the end of the world. I put so much stock into working for others that I didn’t realize that I could work for myself, work my butt off, and make the money I needed and have freedom to enjoy my family. I learned that I was fighting a system that I could and do now define. Also working from home or flexing my time works too-whatever you need it’s out there. Look for what works for you and do that. 

Those tears I cried before I don’t have to now because I get how to move and still do what I love and not have to choose. While I was hoping my husband or fiancé at the time couldn’t make me happy I had to work through it. My hustle now is was different than it was than when I wanted an easy way. Entrepreneurship isn’t easy but if you have ever struggled and learned the lessons it makes it easier. I don’t waste time or leave money on a table. When someone says hey email me let’s chat-email them right away. I make solid connections now and have seen them turn into solid gold just because I bring fear with me until it falls. Life will prepare you for the newness of life but you have to be willing to not fight the lesson. 

So whatever life is throwing your way, don’t ignore the lesson. The harder you fight the lesson you will end up having to repeat it and trust me you waste more time. Don’t waste your time or leave money on the table doing it. Life is trying to give you better you just stuck in the misery and can’t see. Wipe your tears and work smarter not harder.

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