ToiTime

Mental Wellness and Self Care Queen

Mom

To the “angry” Mom, we see you! As we continue the mom’s week series.  I will post multiple blogs since we only have less than a week right?  Right. We are talking about the angry mom.  You know the mom who is so upset that all she does is curse her kids.  You can hear and see the angry mom screaming at her little ones. The little ones are the ones who are caught in the middle. There could be several reasons why the angry mom is angry.  It could be from a bad day.  It could be that the relationship between her and the child’s father is not what she wants it to be.  None of the reasons are ever a good excuse.

Mom

Moms you Can be Frustrated

Now let me pause and correct the misconception of a mom who is angry at something to that of an angry mom.  A mom that is angry is just a frustrated mom.  She is very upset about whatever may have taken place at that current moment. However the angry mom and the way she spews her verbal attack on her kids is something different.  No its not okay to call your children out of their name.  Sorry.  It’s not okay to tell them that they will never be anything just like their father.

Sorry.  It’s not okay to tell them they are lazy, good for nothing, ugly, etc.  Why? As a mother we are responsible for being the first person to shape their minds.  How can you expect good to come from the negative put downs?  Let me guess, they are expected to have never been here before and push pass your foolishness when you as an adult won’t push past what’s causing you to act like that, right? Wrong.

Don’t Take your Anger out on the Kids

Nothing irks me more than seeing that type of ugliness on kids.  I have heard the angry mom call their kids little muthafuckers, bitch, bitchasses, you name it I have heard it all.  I say to myself what in the world would push you to the brink to stoop this low for a child? Than we wonder why these kids have no respect for themselves or others.  We wonder why they are acting out.  I would be too if all I knew was ugliness.  Not to ever high five it but I do understand it.  I know that moms but not all moms like to make excuses.  It’s always someone else who is responsible for our actions.  Let’s call a spade a spade, we are responsible for how we respond even if we can’t prevent the actions of others.  We have to do better.  I’m not bashing the angry mom but I won’t make excuses either.

Mom

No Favoritism Mom

Another form of an angry mom is when a mom likes her son but harbors issues to their daughter or vice versa. Or even has a favorite child (ren) and treats the others like they aren’t just as loved.  I have seen it with good moms.  I am always checking myself to be sure that even though I can’t parent all 3 of my kids the same that I give them all the same love.  Kids have different personalities and because you click well with one isn’t an excuse to mistreat the others.

Mom

Be Realistic on Issues

My plea to the angry woman is to deal with your issues.  Never talk to your child in a demeaning manner.  Never allow your issues to rub on them.  Check yourself.  Even in discipline if you can’t do without anger, than take a break and come back to the issue. I would even suggest counseling.  Sometimes we do things because it’s what we know.  We are used to certain environments. That will only carry you but so far.  When you know better you do better.  So how about we get it together.

My only goal as a parent is that my children don’t have to recover from their childhood.  To be honest I could care less over being a health nut mom, a natural mom, an over protective mom if my kids are sitting on someone’s couch telling them something I did damaged them.  As mom week progresses and you notice you are an angry mom, get help.  Outsource.  Get under a woman that has some of the qualities you want to portray to your little ones.  Whatever it takes but let’s end this cursing our children, slapping them out, and disrespecting kids because of your internal issues.  There are many women out here wanting to be a mom who will never experience bringing life into the world. Do the right thing!

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